Speaking about the reality of the divorce process and life after is often times seen as taboo in our social media world portraying the perfect family inclusive of the white picket fence. However, at least one celebrity is opening up about how difficult the process can be, and that it is okay. Flipping through the local tv channels today, I came across the new Drew Barrymore show. On it, she was discussing her own divorce after a three-year marriage to Will Kopelman. Drew has been quoted as describing her 2016 divorce as “her worst nightmare”. But, this does not have to be your reality. Divorce, although never easy, can be amicable even when you have different views from your ex-spouse.
Especially if children are involved, navigating the process can be difficult. But, it is important to keep remembering that decisions should be made in the best interests of your children. Although you may no longer be married to your ex-spouse, you will need to continue to co-parent with them for the remainder of your lives. However, co-parenting doesn't mean that you need to suffocate your own feelings; just remember to focus on what is most important.
Although it can take time to recover from a divorce, whether emotionally or financially, it will eventually happen. And while you are in the midst of it, make sure you have a strong support group, which can include trusted professionals such as attorneys, financial advisors, and therapists to ensure you as a whole are being taken care of.
If you and your ex-spouse agree to an alternate dispute resolution technique, such as mediation, this can help ease tensions. Utilizing a mediator allows you and your ex-spouse to come to the table (or Zoom in the world as we know it today) to try to reach an agreement on some or all of the issues pending. These can include child custody, support, property division, and the finalization of your divorce itself. In mediation, you are no longer bound by the rules of the State when it comes to things like community property and therefore, can be creative in coming up with an outcome that is completely unique and customized to you and your family.
While going through a divorce, I know it is hard to think about the end result. However, as the Notorious RBG once said, “So often in life, things that you regard as an impediment turn out to be great, good fortune.” You too can see that with the appropriate support, your next chapter can be one that is of great fortune. If you or someone you know needs assistance with either an amicable or contested divorce, make sure to reach out to a trusted Certified Family Law Specialist for advice specific to your matter.